Fitted Sheets - - People FOLD Those?

Last night, I closed the cover on Lisa Quinn's book "Life's Too Short To Fold Fitted Sheets: Your Ultimate Guide to Domestic Liberation" and I was glowing as a result. Why? Because it is over flowing with advice, humor and relevant information for any mother who isn't too stuck up to use it.

Synopsis:

In the tradition of Erma Bombeck and Peg Bracken, author Lisa Quinn Emmy Award-winning television host and recovering Marthaholic gets real on the follies of housekeeping. Life's Too Short to Fold Fitted Sheets is a crash course in Slacker Chic 101 that will have over-extended women everywhere laughing out loud and throwing in the towel the dishtowel, that is. Full of shortcuts and tricks for cleaning, decor, and entertaining, such as: the top 10 things you have to clean if you have company coming in 30 minutes; interior finishes that hide the most dirt; 17 meals made from a deli chicken; and much more, this wickedly funny guide helps women create the life they want without all the hard labor and without compromising style.

When I was approached to host a review of this book {which I received free of charge in exchange} my first thought was "People FOLD fitted sheets?" You don't even want to know what I do with mine...

Fitted Sheets is a quick read. In fact, at the end of the introduction Lisa writes, "I kept it short, because I know you're busy. Perfection is overrated. Live a little." I'll admit, I only skimmed the surface of certain sections {ala entertaining} because I want to be entertained not the entertainer herself. I have a list of amazing tidbits from this book. Here are just a few:

• Rub white candles on your bathroom grout to prevent mold and mildew.
• Pour salt over a spill in your oven. The salt will halt the burning smell and form an easily removable crust over the top of the spill.
• Grab scraps of foil, and cut through six to eight layers with scissors; they will be like new.
• Didn't use a coaster and now you've got an ugly white ring on your table? Rub a little Worcestershire sauce into the ring, and let it sit for a couple of hours. Wipe it off with a rag.
  
• Citrus peels help maintain the integrity of your garbage disposal blades.

The modern woman's life is over flowing with to-do lists. This book gives you permission to relax a little and enjoy the life you've built.

Fitted Sheets is for you if you want to learn more about decorating short cuts and cheats, interior finishes that hide the most dirt and half-assed hospitality!

Don't even bother with this book if you think Martha Stewart's way of life is the only way!

Who is Lisa Quinn, anyway?


She is a recovering Martha-holic, Emmy Award winning TV host, and mother of two. Lisa is a contributor to Better Homes and Gardens, Redbook, Life, and PARADE magazines; has appeared on Good Morning America, the CBS Early Show, HGTV, and Oprah; designed sets for the National Geographic Society and the Discovery Channel; and starred in her own one-hour special for the Fine Living Network. Lisa currently serves as spokesperson for IKEA and DuPont. Home With Lisa Quinn is syndicated nationally on the Live Well HD Network.

Next time you visit your neighbor's house and you notice one of Lisa's short-cuts, you can glance in her direction while holding your glass of wine, smile and give the nod of approval.

Anonymous Submissions - - One Final Release

I can't keep the thoughts in my head

From PinterestFrom the depths of the darkest shadows to sliding down a rainbow into the sun while it tickles my cheeks...

From nonstop tears to the overwhelming sensation of laughter and giddiness...

Talking Talking Talking throughout the day. You peer back with a cock-eyed stare. Am I making sense? I am to me. I don't care...the thoughts? I can't keep them in my head.

The thoughts are racing racing racing and I'm driving down the highway. I throw my head back while going 90 and belt out the loudest laugh I've ever heard.

Oh yeah, the radio. It's on. Who fucking cares what's playing, I'm singing it bitches. And when we come to a stoplight? You'll need to pay me for the entertainment I'm about to provide to you.

Insane? No. Just a good fit for this post!

Still driving...fast fast fast. Oh wow, I've never seen that before. That's morbidly beautiful. Perhaps I can pull over and get a shot this. ::Reaching for my camera::: Oh yeah, that whole driving thing. Man, there's someone behind me, I can't pull over. Head shoots back to let out more fits of laughter.

Don't you...Forget about me...Don't Don't Don't Don't... I sing. Not well but I sing.

Pulling into the driveway...I made it, but I didn't get the shot. There's always tomorrow.

Cake! I'll bake a cake! Fucker got stuck in the pan but it's cake nonetheless. A little cool whip will cover that shit up.

Yes. Yes, we (I) do. (Pinterest)

Dinner. Burritos. Assemble them. Get this shit on the table, I'm hungry. Something isn't quite right here. What am I missing? The rice. I forgot to make the fucking rice. This is going to set us back twenty fucking minutes. & nbsp;

Scream Scream Scream. & nbsp;

Yell Yell Yell. & nbsp;

There's beer in the refrigerator. It'll make it all better. Yep, it will. Beer. The drinkable appetizer. & nbsp;

Eat Eat Eat. & nbsp;

Nom Nom Nom.

(Pinterest)

Dessert. What sweetie? You want a birthday candle? It's your birthday? Hells to the yeah you can have that, no problem.

Clean up, clean up, everybody do your share! Again with the singing.

What? It's time for Phineas and Ferb? Oooooooh yeah!

It's after midnight, aren't you tired? Tired? Me...tired? I could stay awake for DAYS.

I lie down anyway trying to calm the never-ending story playing over and over again in my mind. Eventually, sleep comes and the day has ended, but not before hoping-wishing-begging for this feeling to stick around for tomorrow.

***

(Pinterest)

Hypomania. The good kind. No tweaking to medications have occurred. Depression lifted and this is what I was/am left with (Psssst, it DID stick around. So far, so good!). I rarely get "the good kind". I'm often faced with the anger side of it. Today? I double up the dose of my newest drug. Yay! Maybe this will stick around for all eternity.

What? Call my doctor?

Shut up. Please, just allow me to enjoy this for a little while. Eventually it's going to go away and the darkness will fall once again. I don't need that anytime soon. So for now? I'm eating skittles bitches. Taste the fucking rainbow!

Arroz Con Pollo - My Way {A Recipe}

When I met my husband, I was introduced to a world of new flavor. His family prepares many dishes I adore, each of which had originally been cooked by his grandmother.

One favorite, Arroz Con Pollo {Chicken with Rice), I've eaten on multiple occasions as well as prepared in the various kitchens of the homes we've lived in over the past fourteen years. His family's version though, consists of using yellow rice. Yellow rice contains MSG, and we're not a fan of that in my house.

So I took the original family recipe and put my spin on it. My family loves it and so I'm sharing it with you. I don't measure when it comes to cooking, baking yes, but stick with me here and yours will turn out fabulous, I guarantee it!

Don't hate on the paper plate!

Ingredients

3 Large Chicken Breasts (off the bone) cleaned and cut into thirds (for poaching)
2 Tablespoons Adobo Seasoning, keep it on hand, this is where we shake a little "here and there" as we cook (with or without pepper, I go without and grind my own)
3 Boiling Bags White Rice (you can use the long cooking version if you wish, I just like the shortcut here)
1 Large Green Pepper, Diced
1 Large Red Pepper, Diced
1 Small White Onion, Diced
1 Fresh Jalapeno Pepper, Seeded and Diced (doesn't add a lot of heat just a nice kick in the background)
3-4 Cloves Garlic, Minced
2-3 Tablespoons Extra Virgin Olive Oil
1 Can Petite Diced Tomato (optional)
Salt and Pepper to Taste

Directions

Heat up a large pot and add the olive oil. Toss in the peppers, onion and garlic and sweat it out. Add salt and pepper to taste.

While the veggies are working their magic, bring a pot of water to a boil. Remember, I don't measure. I simply take the pot I cook my spaghetti in, fill 'er up half way and go. Once it boils, reduce the heat to a slow simmer. Add 2 tablespoons of Adobo Seasoning and give the water a stir to make sure it dissolves. Now place your chicken in the pot, set a timer for 12 minutes and have a glass of wine while you wait (This is where I usually throw 2 boxes of Jif Cornbread into the oven to serve on the side. YUM!).

When the chicken is ready, remove it from the water and set aside for a & nbsp; moment. Rinse the pot, refill it for the rice and get that water rolling once more. Now grab two forks and shred the chicken. Once it's shredded, add the chicken to the veggies. Grab your Adobo and liberally season the chicken before you stir it into the veggies. Keep that burner going on low to keep it warm.

Once the rice is cooked (10 minutes for those boiling bags!), drain it well and add it to the chicken and veggies. Go ahead and shake on some salt and pepper before you stir (I add a bit more Adobo here too).

This is where you would add the diced tomatoes if you wish. Sometimes...I'm just not in the mood. It's good with or without.

Now get that cornbread out of the oven because this meal is hittin' the table.

Enjoy!

P.S. I don't know the nutritional value of this meal. This serves two teenagers (boys), my husband and myself with enough leftovers for one teenager the following day.

Follow me on Pinterest....I'm hoping to add more recipes soon but in the meantime? Stop by and giggle at my funny pins.

Minute to Minute

My weekend was filled with lack of motivation, but I got some things done.

On Saturday, my family went to my mother's for dinner, first time in almost a year. Shit happened, amends were made, yada... yada... yada... Our 20 month old saw a cat for the first time, ever. It was the funniest scene. He was so scared, then curious, then startled. At one point during the night, my son stood in a doorway with his back to the cat. The cat then decided to take her space back and walked by my son. My son jumped out of his diaper! It felt good to really laugh.

Prior to visiting with my mom, I took a very long nap in place of grocery shopping. It felt fantastic. I really remember feeling, I don't feel so bad today. In fact, I feel kind of good! Then I woke up and realized how much pressure I was putting on myself for Sunday. The anxiety was so heavy. Why can't I be a glass half full kind of girl?

Sunday arrived and I used every excuse in the book not to go grocery shopping. I did load after load of laundry and watched the freaking marathon of Teen Mom on MTV. Seriously, that show is addicting! By 3pm I caught a second wind and got the rest of my chores done.

Today, I'm back in the office. Miserable. Lonely. Sad. Anxious. Tense. So very, very tense. I figured a way to stretch my shoulders and back when it gets really bad but it doesn't seem to be doing the job today. I'd give anything to feel at ease.

There's only one person in my office who knows my situation and I only skimmed the surface when I told him. He has always been very open and honest with me. My other co-workers are very close-minded and negative individuals. I used to be so carefree and smiley here but now they just add to my sorrow. I guess I'm following their lead.

To top it all off, I spent the weekend on the phone with a girl who feels so helpless that she wants to take her own life. She feels like there's no end in sight. PPD is ruling her mind. My husband finally stepped in and said he needed to worry about me and my health so it was time to stop chatting with her. I reached out to a few others via Twitter who said the same thing. Take care of me.

Will someone take care of me?

Leave me a trail of breadcrumbs to the woman I once was and I'll gladly follow the path home...

Womanly Inspiration

Write a new post about a woman who inspires you.

Growing Pains

For approximately four years I have been going on and on and on, on this little blog mainly regarding mental health. I think it's time to shift gears and maybe grow up a little bit, in a sense.

I don't want to be known only as a blogger. Not that there's anything wrong with that, of course! I would rather be known as a writer. Blogging has opened doors I didn't know existed. I just think it's time to transition in what I blog about.

For about a week now, I've been reading a lot about the writing process and what all it entails from the viewpoint of one author. I'm taking the advice written in one book specifically (Bird By Bird By Anne Lamott) that simply says to sit down at the same time every day and just write (among many other things). It's a lot harder than one might think.

What I'm getting at here is that I'm going to be writing a lot of essays in the days to come. Some will be blog publishing worthy and others won't. I'll take my chances. But that's where this blog is heading....it's growing up in a way.

I'd love for you to grow with me.

Wordless {Wordful} Wednesday - - Baby Boy

The car I keep in my purse that belongs to him because it makes me feel safe...

Part of the Halloween costume he wears everyday because he loves it...

I'll do just about anything to see him make this face...

Secrets, Illness & Karma

Are you a firm believer that everything happens for a reason? You know, a glass half-full kind of person? I'm not. I wouldn't call myself a pessimist though. I like to say that I'm more of a realist. & nbsp;

When I overcame postpartum depression I did kind of feel like a better person. Mainly because I had the necessary experience to coach other new moms in similar situations. And I did. And I still do to this day. Nobody should have to ride that illness out alone. Nobody.

Then I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, and let me tell you, there's no good coming from this. The extreme highs are wonderful but what goes up (insert cliche here)...The downs are gut wrenching and horrifying. & nbsp;

I think about illness just about everyday (how could I not?). I will let you in on a secret of my own...When I'm in my lowest of lows, I'll admit it, sometimes I wish for an incurable illness to put me out of my misery. But on the other hand, because I'm an active blogger and social media addict, I see how things like that tears families apart.

Think about the people who have never smoked a day in their lives and POOF! Lung cancer. Or what about the people who eat right and work their body out regularly and POOF! Heart disease. I don't know about you, but I have a hard time trying to find the positive in instances like these. But it happens everyday. & nbsp;

I see people who are really good people. They think of others before they think of themselves and they're always smiling. Then tragedy strikes. I often live in fear that bad things are going to happen because I see more negative than positive. (Have you tried to watch the news lately?) But that's no way to live. & nbsp; & nbsp;

I guess I need a lesson in karma. & nbsp;

This post was inspired by the novel Those We Love Most by Lee Woodruff. Every family has its secrets and deceptions, but they come to surface a tragic accident changes the family dynamic forever. Join From Left to Write on June 6 as we discuss Those We Love Most. You can also enter to win a live video chat with Lee Woodruff! As a member, I received a copy of the book for review purposes.

His One & Only

The tree limbs were in that conscious divide, part ofthe way dying and part of the way springing back to life. It overlooked theonce busy lake. At one time it housed children swimming within its shallows andfishing poles hanging where the water deepened.

Once a happy place of wonder and joy; now full ofsorrow and angst. What appeared punched with blue now cropped into an abyss.Black and without feeling. & nbsp;

The house backed up to the reservoir where it alwayssmelled like Thanksgiving. Perfect meals and baked goods formerly prepared withoutflaw. Now it stands as an empty birdcage. The house that no longer held ontorelationships anew. It withered and dwindled into nothingness. Thoughts longforgotten. Memories shaded.

His love was lost. When she vanished, out went thesmells and tastes and colors. She who created what once was. His cares wereabandoned.

His once smooth exterior was now wrinkled and pining forthe care of a woman. He was lost and aging. Almost gone.

Waiting.

Just waiting.

To join her again.

Black and white.

{Adult Beverage of the Week } Mistletoe

About.com

I know, I know....It's been waaaaay too long since I've announced an "Adult Beverage/Beer of the Week". But here it is biznitches....This one is fancy schmancy!

Mistletoe

Ingredients

1 Ounce Tequila & nbsp;

1/2 Ounce Triple Sec

1/2 Ounce Pomegranate Juice

Champagne

Pour everything but the champagne into a chilled champagne flute. Top with champagne.

Champagne goes down like candy....Drink a few of these and you won't be needing a mistletoe to be kissing on some people!

Masquerade

I don't do anything anymore. I mean, I go through the daily motions of mundane living, shower, work, make dinner, do dishes, clean house, etc...but I only do those things because I have to. If I had it my way, I'd lie on my couch all day long and watch movie after movie or read my Kindle. Just like I have been every weekend for a few weeks in a row now.

I try to tell myself I'm not depressed anymore but find myself in tears every day.

I talk myself out of taking the antianxiety pill a second time each day even though I feel like I need it. & nbsp;

The thoughts haven't left. The intrusive ones. I buried them in the back of my mind, in that place only I know about. Sometimes I visit that place and play with my buried treasures because "What IF...." & nbsp;

I'm not happy. I'm good at disguising that, mostly.

I want so much for my family. My boys are growing up. I'm the mother of an almost 17-year old who stresses me out daily. I want him to have more than what I had. I want him to stop being lazy and get his ass in gear. It's time he really thinks about what he wants out of this thing called life. & nbsp;

I'm also the mother of an almost 7th grader. He starts middle school this month. He'll be 13 next year. He's passionate about so many things and I want him to hold on to that passion; to covet it, savor it.

I'm also the mother to a 2 year old. Almost 2 1/2 year old. He's the one who changed me for the long haul. I don't blame him, no, never. I couldn't imagine my life without him. & nbsp;

I'm a wife. Not a very good one lately. I know my issues are making it hard on my husband. I know he wants to fix me. Or rather, have the fixed me back. I'm unable to deliver, in more ways than one.

I can't imagine my life without this veil over my head anymore. This veil I want to shred to fucking pieces. It's become a part of me. It is me. I'm the veil.

Occasionally I get to peak out from beneath the veil and have a few days visitation without it lingering over me. It's a masquerade though. The costume is stripped and I am me again eventually. Only, I'm the new me. The one I hardly recognize. & nbsp;