Or in my case, you burn the hell out of the hot dogs you left on the grill with the burner on a whee bit too high and then totally forgot you put them on there in the first place and now you need to run to the store for new hot dogs but then they don't have the brand you want and so you settle for the next best thing in hopes to trick your husband, but then while you're turning the new hot dogs over on the grill he's banging on the door from behind you shouting, "Are those Nathan's?" and your mind is all, "How the fuck did he know I got Sabrett's. Fucker has hot dog x-ray vision!" while you're all giving him the "what??" look like you can't hear him through the glass door?
You know exactly what I'm talking about, don't you?
Okay, so I may have had the detailed instance above happen to me this week so I hit the grocery store at super sonic speed..... While I was running down the aisle with all the condiments, you know, the dressing, ketchup, mustard, barbecue sauces.... I stopped mid-stride to observe the beauty of the aisle.
For whatever reason, I was the only one in this aisle at the time. When I said I stopped mid-stride, I mean my feet stopped way before the upper half of my body and I nearly took a nose dive!
Why you ask?
The shelves were so orderly. All the labels were facing forward and there were no gaps. These shelves were stocked to their fullest capacity!
Get on with it? Fine...
I wanted so badly to stick my arm in between the dressing bottles and run. I wanted to take out all those condiments and watch them fall to the floor. I wanted to create complete chaos among the ketchup and mustard bottles. Anarchy in the condiment aisle!!!
I may need to get a life. Or stop burning hot dogs to avoid trips such as this. Either one.
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